The thing about a "label" is anyone can choose to adopt a label and define it in their own way. There's no centralized leadership for any of the "ism's" of the world. The definitions are pretty set and solid, such as "socialism" as a political concept and "elitism" as a social concept, BUT

the people assign their own ideas about what actions constitute the term.

For example, socialism is often demonized by people who don't understand it and capitalism also gets the same slaying. Yet, both are simply ways of organizing economic and political systems and both can be bad and good depending on WHO is taking action.

Feminism is even more loosely defined than these two. And the reason many women of color have abandoned the term long ago, is because we did not agree with some of the loudest voices who claimed they were "feminist."

Feminism has for a long time been on a tangent that alienated many.

How?

By focusing on specific behaviors and ways of life as being "progressive for women" while bashing others. The goal should always be rights to freely choose for oneself. And if someone chooses to have 7 kids and be a virgin until marriage, she should not feel like other women judge her as "controlled by manmade systems."

By bashing "masculinity" instead of the real issue, which was an imbalanced power structure.

The term "toxic masculinity" pushed a lot of people away because it was used to bash manhood, when reality is.. masculinity is not toxic.

we can call out toxic behavior whereever we see it without alienating groups. If someone interrupts me in a meeting, why do I call the man "toxically masculine" but I can't call the woman "toxically feminine?"

Both are simply toxic and disrespectful in their actions.

Further, the animosity created in some feminist spaces fomented with anger toward men, while most women of color do not want distance from the men in our lives. We see them as support and comrades in our shared struggles.

What we can all call out is: Misogyny and Misogynoir.

That's the real issue. Not masculinity.

So the thesis of this is: Feminism has been alienating people for decades and has also been co-opted by others who claim their beliefs are uplifting women, even if others do not agree.

I consider myself a Humanist - because my aim is equity and sustainability. No person is the enemy to that process. Only actions are.

The sooner we focus our efforts on transforming actions, instead of aiming our ire at people and figures, the better and more successful our work will be.